What I Think Of Emma Woodhouse

A poem in the style of Doctor Suess // Expressing my righteous indignation at Emma Woodhouse from Jane Austen’s Emma


I do not like her in a book

I do not like her in a nook

I do not like her personality

She would not win Miss Congeniality.


I do not like her here and there

I do not like her in her lair

If people heard the things she said

Behind their backs, they’d flush red.


Perhaps I’d like her with some kindness

Her biggest fault might be her blindness

Her prejudice could be much less

She’s worse than Miss Elizabeth*.


I do not like her matchmaking

It leaves my miserable head aching

From the times I’ve banged it against the wall

I do not like her, she makes me bawl.


Perhaps later in the story

She’ll fall in a different category

But until time can tell,

I do not like her. All is well.




I hope you were amused by my mini-poetical-rant. Seriously, am I the only person in the world who doesn’t like Emma Woodhouse? Pride and Prejudice was sooooo much better.





  1. Joah

    April 3, 2017 at 5:14 pm

    Well, Jane Austin did say that Emma was the kind of person only she (Austin) could like.

    1. Zane Jones

      April 3, 2017 at 7:29 pm

      Did she? I didn’t know that! I certainly don’t like her (Emma).

  2. Kate Willis

    May 2, 2017 at 5:20 pm

    I’ve only watched the movie, but I did find her insufferable for a long while! Have you tried reading Sarah Holman’s adaption “Emmeline”? It’s from a Christian perspective which is really cool. 😉

    Nice blog by the way!

    1. Zane Jones

      May 2, 2017 at 9:46 pm

      Wow, that sounds really interesting! I just marked it to-read on Goodreads 🙂 And thank you!

Leave a Reply